Please tell me this isn’t just me R@Y Stalk Me: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ray365/ Vine: is dead, RIP Twitter: …

42 COMMENTS

  1. Before you comment on this video, a lot of you seem to be missing the point. Of COURSE I know that youth group was to grow my relationship with God. HOWEVER, why would I continue to go to a program where I was ignored and treated poorly?? Where the youth pastor had to be REMINDED to check up on me after my parents went to him, concerned about my mental health? A lot of you need perspective, because it seems as though many of you were accepted by your churches and groups. Some of us are Christians who, for one reason or another, didn’t fit in and were shut out as a result. I’m really sick of seeing the “oh well church is to grow your relationship with God” comment. I KNOW. I’m tired of coming back to this video from two years ago to people invalidating my experience as a high schooler because they think I had my focus on the wrong thing. My focus was always my relationship with God, but it’s not wrong to expect to not be bullied at church.

  2. I totally understand your situation. My daughter experienced this same situation of try to fit in from outside the existing cliques. I wasn’t a church kid growing up, so I didn’t see it, but she sure did. The adults in the room are the ones who failed you – They should be working hard to break down the cliques, but often adults think if we throw a bunch of kids in a room they’ll figure it out. Often, they don’t. Be blessed and thanks for sharing.

  3. This is a real unfortunate reality that happens (creation of cliques and not readily accepting newbies). I'm trying to improve my youth group and this gives me a perspective to work with. Thanks for sharing your experience. Stay blessed

  4. Here's what bothers me where I see church leaders pressing to.
    Relationships but the wrong ones.
    They are looking to establish with one another, I get it. What is the wrong direction is many in churches need a stronger relationship with the God of Israel FIRST. Sadly, the faith we have in God is shallow. They only want to know God in certain aspects and not all. They get disappointed when they hear the just God, the jealous God, and the judgment of God. Because of this, they have no reverence for God.
    Sadly, us parents feel it is the churches job to disciple their children and youth group is nothing more than a school gathering where you get entertained. Regular service is nothing more than biblical entertainment and those who are hungry for God starve and can't find a place, so the youth get pulled back to the world, where many want an authentic relationship as well.
    Even at my age, I cannot satisfy this hunger in a church full of contentment filled carnal Christians. I spend more time alone with God because of the selfishness I see.
    We are few and the American Church needs to get back to the way God desires the Bride to be. Ironically, we believe our method is pleasing to God, boasting of the five they baptize and losing the twenty before college.
    We bring the menu but don't deliver the food. Parents, we are just as guilty. It is our job to disciple our offspring, not the church. She is not equipped properly.
    Godly fathers are.
    Please forgive us for our wrong.

  5. I'm sorry this was your experience, but I would like to say that not all youth experiences are bad or youth leaders or so disconnected. I still check in on youth I knew 15 years ago. Many are married and have kids, but I still message them every once and a while to see how their life is going. Even beside my facebook name, I have written (protect them). To me, my dedication to youth is life and limb. If it requires my life, than so be it, because my dedication to youth and God's path for me for Youth is as absolute as I try to make it

  6. Rachel do you still respond to comments on this post? I would like to PM you… I appreciate your perspective and I as a parent of a youth and a youth leader I value truth you speak of and I would like the chance to ask some more questions and get your feed back without public intrusion….?

  7. I’m sorry but I am a teen Christian and I only love church I am always there at church my youth pastor always wants to connect with us my dad is a pastor. Sry but you need god in your life to hate on this

  8. I thought about joining a youth group but quickly diminished that thought. I was introverted in highschool and at 21 I dont want to be subjected to that unwelcoming environment. I know that a youth group should be Inclusive because its religious but its not. The people are the same regardless.

  9. this happened to me at my old church. i felt excluded from everything because they all went to a different school than me but the churches youth group i’m at now is amazing and i couldn’t have asked for a better one

  10. This was very helpful 👍. Very brave to put this out here. I applaud you for doing so. It’s sad that THIS experience unfortunately, happens a lot; in any group…so I pray you continue to pursue Jesus and ✨ shine bright through Him.

  11. I’m so sorry you beautiful made queens and kings of God have to go through that. But just remember Jesus was not the popular one when He was here on earth. His own rejected Him. I’m a youth leader trying to get insight to make youth group a place to be and everyone welcomed. I was labeled the trouble child in the church I went to in my youth group, I’m going to change that in Jesus name. Amen

  12. I am 70 years old and since middle school and high school I have always thought youth should sit in the front seats in church and church should be age integrated. The gospel is not different for any age. Also, most youth groups pull kids away from parents, in my opinion.

  13. It is very true for many kids that come into youth group. I am a Youth group Leader and have seen teens come in and feel awkward or not enjoy because they are new and there is clicks. It is like school if a leader allows it. I let my teens know that our Youth group is a place where kids feel safe, loved, wanted, and they are all there to encourage each other. When we have someone new we make them part and not excluded. It is not a place to be judged but a place where we can live each other where we are at and learn about God and find what we are good at so we can reach into our community and give someone hope. We can’t fix each other but we can pray and encourage and listen. I gave my life over 8 years ago and I want to encourage teens that they are going to struggle but they are never alone. I pray that even though you had a bad experience that you will see that God was there. People are people but God is God and He is good. He is worth learning about and letting Him change how we see things and helps us to listen and then He changes our heart pursuing Him. It is truly AMAZING! It is a hard walk for we stumble in the flesh but He picks us back up, dusts us off, and directs our steps. May you pursue God and not give up just because of others. You have to do it to find out for yourself. ❤️

  14. It’s not just junior high and high school 🏫, it’s Young Adults, at 29 years old, I went to one of the Young Adults and being new into town. I talked to some of the quiet people, had a couple of girls stare at me but didn’t talk to me (I’m a man 👨). But the cliches there were SO real and disgusted me, I was brand new to this group and NO ONE but the ushers greeted me. I was SO out of place, I might give it another chance, but idk 🤷‍♀️ what’s ironic, some of the people were taller than me, but I was physically bigger.

  15. there’s just like no one at my church. “youth group” is literally ten kids ages 6-18. & bc there’s so little people in youth group there’s really two groups. the older kids and younger kids. but the younger kids just tag a long with their older siblings. my problem is that all the older people are in the same two grades & even though i’m only a year younger than everyone and even though i grew up with them in the church it’s just a big clique. like i hate going to church sunday & wednesday evenings because they always try and exclude me. i never did anything that’s just the way it’s always been. cheers to youth group cliques!

  16. I don't hate all of this but sometimes some of those guys could be some arrogants and avoid you if you do just 1 simple mistake … Because many of the have a complex of moral superiority too toxic

  17. I relate to this so so hard especially when I was in middle school, I graduated this year so I’ll miss youth group a lot, also it took me all the way till 11th and 12th grade till I was actually like had friends and knew everyone kind of thing.

  18. just when im thinking that youth cruch groups are cool, this video is recomended to me, why?, still good to know that being there doesnt mean you are gonna always good.

  19. My experience with youth groups has been that they are entertaining and that's about it. The best thing about youth groups is the social structure. It's still very much like middle school, but alienating others was never the goal. Out of 35 years in church, social structure was the only good that I saw. The popularity contest never ends and they just keep ordering pizza. Great show.

  20. Rachel, thank you so much for sharing your experience. I am a leader in a youth group and have heard this from some teens. My own son being one of them. I will be honest, I think it happens in adult groups also. Sadly. I am so sorry for your hurt and hope and pray you are able to find a group that is inviting and is able to embrace you and you them. I do have a couple of girls that have a heart for those that sit by themselves. They do give up kind of quickly if no response. What do you think would be helpful for those who don't feel included?

  21. ( 2 ) : WHY PASTOR LED CHURCHES ARE UNBIBLICAL !
    Nowhere in the new testament will you find any evidence of any of the early churches being led by one man : but in every church there were always ordained elders ” PLURAL ” , in each church :  Acts 14(23) : ” And when they had ordained ELDERS IN EVERY CHURCH ”  and  Titus 1(5) :  ” ORDAIN ELDERS IN EVERY CITY , as I had appointed thee . ”                                                                                                                                              Christ clearly said that HE WAS THE ONLY HEAD over all men , and that ALL OTHER MEN WERE BROTHERS :  MATTHEW 23(8) :  ” But be ye not called Rabbi , for ONE IS YOUR MASTER : EVEN CHRIST, and ALL YE ARE BRETHREN !                                                                                      For any man to elevate himself above all the other brothers in the church , or to be elevated above all the other brothers, as the supposed pastor, or leader, or whatever is completely contrary to what CHRIST taught,  as we have just read where he said he was the only master and ALL others were brothers!      The appointed elders in each church were still just brothers, but brothers that were older in the Lord :  hence the name elders : as CHRIST said there are only brothers in his true church MT. 23(8).                                                                                                                                                                                    The apostle Peter of course knew this and thus referred to himself as just an elder :  1 Peter 5(1) :  ” The elders who are among you I exhort, WHO AM ALSO AN ELDER.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                       The apostle John also referred to himself as just an elder :  2 John (1) :  ”  THE ELDER unto the elect lady ” and 3 John (1) : ” THE ELDER unto the well beloved Gauis . ”                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Things were not decided in God’s early church by one man as the supposed leader , but ALWAYS THE ELDERS GOT TOGETHER AND DISCUSSED  THE MATTER  and came to an agreement together on any matter :  ACTS 15(6&22) :   ” And the apostles and elders came together for to consider of this matter ” and  ”  then pleased it the apostles and elders , with the whole church, to send chosen men.”                                                                                 When Paul visited various churches he did not ask to see one man as the supposed head of the church , but he asked to see THE TRUE LEADERS OF THE CHURCH , THE ELDERS :  ACTS 20(17) : ” And from Miletus he sent to Ephesus , and called THE ELDERS of the church .”                                  When Paul visited James at the Jerusalem church , he did not meet with James alone , but all the elders were present :  ACTS 21(18) : ” And the day following Paul went in with us unto James , AND ALL THE ELDERS WERE PRESENT ! ”                                                                                                   With one person heading a church , as is the case with most churches today , people can become totally controlled by this man instead of God :  but with ELDERS PLURAL  heading the church the brothers plural keep each other in check but with one person this is of course not possible , which is why the Bible says :  PROVERBS 11(14) : ” IN THE MULTITUDE OF COUNSELLORS THERE IS SAFETY !”                                                                              So if this is not the situation in your church , then competent elders PLURAL  should be appointed in your church , BY AND FROM THE CHURCH BODY ITSELF , AND THESE ELDERS PLURAL , SHOULD BE THE PROPER CHURCH AUTHORITY :  ” NEVER ONE MAN ! ”
      Please join my facebook group at : SHEEP RESCUERS
     

  22. I just hate young adult groups Christian groups. They are so shallow and so shallow. I had a bunch of fake friends that love bombed me but went out behind back and left me out of alot of social events unless religion was involved

  23. This is happening in adult Sunday school too… And I’m really over it! I went to a large church and a lot of clicks were already formed so it was hard to find a place to fit in. So now I’m going to a new church and it’s a fairly new church and it’s growing so fast… But you can already tell there are clicks and im like uggghhh

  24. DO WE NEED CHURCHES?
    Rev 21(22): And I saw NO TEMPLE therein , for the Lord God Almighty , and the Lamb are the temple of it !
    NO CHURCH BUILDINGS IN THE HEAVENLY CITY!
    Acts 7(48&49): Howbeit , the most high dwells not in TEMPLES MADE WITH HANDS , as saith the prophet !
    Heaven is my throne , and earth is my foot stool : WHAT HOUSE WILL YOU BUILD ME ?
    Nowhere did Jesus ever say to build church buildings !
    Why is the first thing people think they need to do , is build a church building ?
    Where they got this idea , I don't know , because it's not found in scripture , neither did Christ teach it anywhere !
    The early church met in their homes , not church buildings .
    ◦ These church buildings give these people the illusion , that if they just go to a church building once a week , they are serving God , and they do not have to do anything else !
    ◦ Going to church is just going to church : it is not serving God !
    ◦ What would these people do if they did not have their church building to go to once a week ?
    ◦ Why they would be left with nothing to do but witness to people , but because they can just go to their church they do not do this !
    ◦ And they have a tendency to just talk about their church , their group , and their pastor more then God !
    ◦ Sorry , going to a church building once a week , and doing nothing else is not going to fly with Jesus : Rev 3(15-17) !

    ◦ More info : go to : SHEEP RESCUERS

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